"Why did the Ukrainians have to kill us?": Refugees fleeing Donbass speak to RT

These people have been in a state of war for years. Now they just want peace.

A few days before Russia launched its special military operation in Ukraine, the leaders of the then unrecognised breakaway republics of Donbass publicly reported that tensions were escalating and called for the evacuation of civilians. Since the start of the offensive, Russia has reportedly taken in some 200,000 people from the republic, while the UN estimates that the number of refugees from Ukraine exceeds 2 million.

Many have been settled in the Rostov region bordering the Donetsk People's Republic (DPR). They are being accommodated in local hotels, and food and supplies continue to arrive through humanitarian assistance. I contacted one of the organisations assisting with the refugee programme and was able to interview several people at a hotel on the left bank of the Don River. Here you can meet women and children who have fled the war that destroyed their homes.

Natalia is from Gorlovka, a town not far from Donetsk. Gorlovka, as you know, was the scene of some of the most terrible and destructive fighting in the world a few years ago. On the morning of the interview, I went through the reports and it was clear that both Donetsk and the surrounding areas were once again an active war zone, where even most war correspondents were no longer allowed to enter. As we speak, Natalya is drinking coffee, smoking cigarette after cigarette, trying to control a robust little boy of about five. Natalya is here with her younger son and a grandchild. Her husband, who serves in the DPR People's Militia, thought it best to send them to a safer place.

"On the night of 18 February we were bombed. A bomb exploded not far from us. Thank God none of us were hurt, but we were very scared, especially the little one. As soon as the evacuation was announced, we packed up and left. It didn't take more than 15 minutes.

"My husband has been with the militia since May 2014. Last year we were there in the thick of it and saw everything with our own eyes. Our son is 14 and he is a very scared boy. He was only 5 when the war started. He learned to react to the air raid before many other things. When we shouted "Hallway!" it meant that at that moment he had to hide in the hallway because there were no windows and it was the safest place in the house. We always hid in the hallway. We had no basement to use.

"There have been a lot of bombings in the last few years. It almost feels like we've been bombed every day. Gorlovka was shelled a lot in 2014 and 2015. Then it subsided and the mines mostly landed on the outskirts, while the central parts of the city remained safe. But now the situation is bad again, and not a single house has any windows left. There is mass shelling. We fear very much for the lives of our loved ones who are still there. It is difficult to reach my husband. He calls whenever he can and if I pick up immediately we can talk. If I miss the opportunity, I wait longer until the next time he tries to contact me. I am afraid.

"It was a very scary experience. You learn to recognise a threat by the tone of your voice. You hear the shot, the bullet coming, and you count one, two, three, four, five, explosion. "You have to hide in the hallway at times like this. If the projectile takes longer to explode, it might land further away, but you never know, it might land closer. If it makes a beeping sound, it's a 120mm cannon. If it makes a rattling sound, it's a 150mm. But you can't guess where it's going to hit. Each shot is followed by 10 to 20 minutes of silence. Then we can move.

"You have to be alert at all times, you have to be vigilant, you have to stay alert even when you're asleep. You have to walk carefully. If you hear an explosion, it is better to immediately duck and hide; you must always think where and how you can duck and hide.

"In 2014, we were not prepared, so many people were killed or injured. Now people are trying to stay safe and they know how to do it. My neighbour even fought in the trenches at the front. He had three concussions and for health reasons he can no longer serve.

"When we arrived at the hotel here, there were fireworks. It was beautiful, there was some kind of party not far from here I think. My son jumped from the bed to the floor - it's a habit with him. My grandson got upset: 'Grandma, what is it? So we had to take him outside and show him that it really was fireworks, not bombs.

"The planes scared us at first. The last time we had to evacuate here for a short time after the air raids. It's a reflex - if you see a plane, even a civilian one, you jump down, run to the ground and take cover.

"We always tried to get our kids to school and back. Sometimes the bombing was not so intense and the children were free to play outside".

Asked what the DPR and LPR people think about current events, Natalya was quick to respond; she knows where her loyalties lie and why.

"People are happy. Of course they are afraid, but they are happy. This is finally progress. For eight years we have lived surrounded by enemies. And now we are being shot at more, people are dying, but this is just the beginning, we are punishing those... monsters. Yes, monsters, I can't call them anything else.

"We are mad. We are tired. We're waiting for them to be pushed away. The further away the better. The best thing is to drive them to Poland and lock them up there. We want to go home more than anything. It's good here, people help us, but we have a home. I was born in Gorlovka.

"Before the war my husband was a coal miner. He worked in a mine until the Trade Union House in Odessa burnt down, where there were people. That happened on May 2 and on May 5 my husband finished his shift and went to war. And I haven't seen him much since. He rarely visits us. Now Grad is firing rockets at Gorlovka. I saw the explosions with my own eyes, it's better to stay away from there.

"In 2014 a family was killed in the building next to ours. A projectile hit the 8th floor of the apartment building. A husband, a wife, their son, who had just started first grade at school, and their 5-year-old daughter. Four floors collapsed after the grenade hit. The building has been restored, but people are too scared to live there.

"Why is this happening to us? Is it because we refused to speak Ukrainian and teach our children? Is it because we wanted to celebrate Victory Day? Or because we respect our elders and our history? Why did they have to kill us for that?

"I don't understand Ukrainian. I was born and raised in Ukraine, but I have mostly Russian roots. My son knows history well - he likes to learn about these things. And he knows perfectly well that we are not part of Ukraine and never have been. Our region "fed" Ukraine with all its resources, and now they say we are poor and need to be supported".

Nelly Ivanovna, another Gorlovka resident, who was evacuated to Rostov with her granddaughter. She still has relatives and friends in Donetsk and other cities of the DPR. While talking to me, Elena, a younger woman from Donetsk, occasionally joins in the conversation. There are other women, all with young children, who have something to say.

"We have been living under artillery fire since 2014. We keep talking about it to the media, but nothing changes. This is not normal. We live in constant fear and anxiety. When we are under fire during the day, at least we know where to run to, but at night it is much easier to give in to panic. You have to experience it for yourself to understand - I could talk for hours about these things, but words can't describe what it's really like out there".

As the war dragged on, the women of the DPRK mastered ways to keep themselves safe during the bombardments. They tell us how to go from shelter to shelter, talk about the range of shrapnel from grenades, etc. This seems to be the first thing that comes to mind when they are asked about life in their home towns.

"I used to be good friends with a family from Poltava. They speak Ukrainian. I love the language, I really love it - so rich and melodious. Language should never be used as an excuse for war! Earlier I called my Ukrainian friends and told them our situation, all the shelling. It was as if they heard our situation, as if they sympathised with us. And now that they heard explosions outside their own town, they panicked: "The Russians are invading our land!". We have been living like this for eight years and it is still with us," says Nelly.

"I called my relatives the other day. They told me that on 3 February a grenade hit a house on Korolenko Street. This is the central part of the city. A family, including two small children, was injured. People are afraid to leave their homes for fear of another attack. It is a nightmare."

Nelly brings up the 'Gorlovka Madonna' - Kristina Zhuk's name was trumpeted on social media after a Ukrainian grenade killed her and her 10-month-old daughter in July 2014. When it happened, Kristina was walking in the park with her daughter. A journalist, who happened to be there, witnessed her last moments of agony, providing one of the first photographic proof of Ukraine's indiscriminate use of weapons against the people of Donbass.

Nelly does not remember the name of the murdered woman, but says her story is a depiction of life in Gorlovka during the conflict in Donbass. She recalls that there are memorials to children killed in the war in Gorlovka and other parts of the DPRK. But the memory of these children lives only in the hearts of local people who saw the deaths with their own eyes.

"In 2014, I went out to buy something and I heard this rustling. Someone shouted for us to get off and everyone got off. Several shells exploded. I lay on the ground for a while, but when it got quieter, I decided to try to get to some shelter. There was a church nearby - very nice and new. Many people were rushing there and I wondered if I could make it. So I ran. I think fear helped because I ran very fast. I was just going down to the basement of the church when I heard the shells flying again. They hit the ground nearby and I was relieved that I had timed it right.

"There were many people in the cellar, including children. The altar boys had brought tea and some food for everyone, they had put down the mats. Some families lived essentially in this cellar, others for months. And the lucky ones were those who lived in Soviet buildings or in private houses with a suitable cellar. I lived in a new building, on the top floor, so I had nowhere to escape to during the bombing. It is a terrible feeling when you look at the horrors around you and feel powerless to change anything. When I evacuated in 2015, the building I was living in was hit by a grenade. My neighbour on the 7th floor was injured.

"My relatives who still live there say that after the evacuation, the shelling got much worse. Ukrainian forces started shelling Donetsk and the suburbs. Although it's good that there are no air strikes now at least - previously they were shelling us from the air, hitting populated areas.

"All the time we were asking Ukraine to find a compromise and stop the war, but Zelensky refused to talk to 'those people' - that's what he called us. The president, whom we Donbas people did not elect, does not want to listen to us.

"In 2014, many people in the eastern regions revolted against the new regime. There were no weapons - at most, sticks. At that time, Ukrainian armoured vehicles stopped and turned around. They had no orders to crush the protests. Ordinary Ukrainian soldiers could not do that - only armed gangs could do that.

"There are politicians in Ukraine who think we shouldn't be here, that we don't deserve to live on our land. They don't consider us human. Well, we didn't want to be part of their country either. It's not about the language - it's a beautiful language, I learned it at school. What has language got to do with the fact that it is spoken by fools? If Russia had not interfered, they would have tried and shot us again. Without Russia, we would not get along. And the US is just getting rich from the war."

When asked about their expectations for the future, the women are at a loss for words. They simply say they want to live a peaceful life as before, to work and raise their children. Meanwhile, more refugees are arriving in Russia from the new republics every day.

Stepan Kostetsky